I was thinking about posting this, but I didn't have the guts to do it until now. The problem is that I'm always too reluctant to state my opinions. Not because my opinions are wrong or 'cause people will think that they are crazy. The thing is that I'm not comfortable stating them. Most of the time I'd state them with my closest friends, only.

I left this old myself behind. That wasn't me. The "new me" is here. And he doesn't like to keep things to himself.

1. State your opinions. Be honest and transparent.

One of the most important things I could've ever learn (and I'm still learning). So many things in my entire life went wrong because I acted negligently. Things that I felt and didn't say are on the top of the list for things that I should have stated. Now, I'm keeping these items as a permanent note to self:

  • If you aren't feeling O.K. with something, SAY it;
  • If YOU'RE feeling O.K. with something, SAY it too;
  • Always consideer the whole scenario before stating your opinions.

2. Don't be lazy. Take the initiative.

If there was one person doing something, I was probably not going to help in any way. I used to think: "Oh, they're doing it. Why should I do it?".

What I've learned is very simple: if there's someone doing it, then help them/he/she. This is intrinsically linked with taking initiative too, so basically, what this tells me is: "Stop being so selfish and individualist". Go help them in whatever way you can.

3. Pay attention to what people say

We - human beings - are communicative by nature. We have the urge to communicate, to interact and to receive information as part of our coexistence. Now, imagine a world where no ones pay attention to what other people say. It would be caos and we'd live in world full of conflicts.

I used to not pay attention whatsoever for what people, friends or anyone said. Not because I didn't want to hear, but I was always thinking in something else. So, for example, if you were telling me that you had to break up with your girlfriend, in the end of the conversation I'd probably ask again: "Hey, is your girlfriend ok?". In a matter of time people would stop talking with me and I wouldn't even notice it.

Well, like I said, it's basic: I, as a human, do have to interact. And that means that I should be interested in people's lives. But, truly interested... Life is made of very interesting moments and persons that you should - really - pay attention to.

4. Don't try to predict what people will say or do. You aren't god.

When I was a teenager, I used to make an exercise: in the end of the day, I used to lie in bed and start thinking about everything I did that day: every action I did, every word I said.

Then, I'd imagine how it could be different. I was trying to imagine how people would act and what people would say if I did something different.

Later, I was doing this during the day, not in the end of it anymore. Everytime I was in a conversation or doing something, I was trying to predict how people would behave. I was literally having conversations inside my head (spoiler: not healthy).

Yes, as you can see, I was becoming paranoid as I was trying to built some kind of "controlled world" where people would only act or say things the way I want.

Well, guess what? The beautiful thing on our entire existence is the fact that we don't know anything. We're in a constantly process of building our own life. We can't predict anything, but we're always trying to build something valuable for ourselves. Acting like if you were God is just saying to the world that you aren't ready to the randomness of life.

It's like saying to everyone that you're afraid of the world and afraid of what life can offer to you.

5. Ok, you hurt someone. Go tell them you're sorry and leave the bad feelings in the past.

In life, there will be - no doubts - a day you'll hurt someones' feeling. It's part of the learning process that is life. You hurt someone and then you ask for forgiveness. It's normal because you learn to understand how the person feels, how to understand the feelings of the person and how to not hurt again in the future.

Basically, the rule is: go tell them, immediately, that you're sorry. Do not keep it for yourself or wait for them to talk to you about it. Open your heart and only good things will come.